May 31, 2008 by Ashley.

I meant to put this up way sooner, but late is better than never. It’s long, but I figured everyone wants to know ALL the details :). Plus it’s kinda more for my records anyway so I don’t have to write it all in my journal.

So it all began Monday around 4/5pm when my painless Braxton Hicks contractions became painful. I dutifully started my relaxation techniques that I had been practicing for months. I talked with Pat and debated back and forth “Is this it?!” Hours later when the contractions got more and more painful and wouldn’t stop that Yes - this was it! Although my contractions weren’t very regular, they were very uncomfortable so around 4am Tues we decided to go into the hospital. I went in to the screening room where they announced I was 2 cm dialated (disappointing). They also said I was severely dehydrated so I had to drink these giant cups of water (like Big Gulps at 7-eleven) before the doctor could decide whether to admit me or not. A couple hours later they checked me again and the nurse there said I was 3.5 cm. It was decided I would be admitted - I was very excited. (Later I figured that this nurse didn’t have as much experience as you want in a nurse). So we did the paperwork and the (new) nurse put my IV plug in. The IV process was horrible. She puts it in at first and I’m ‘Ouching’ and “Ohhing” until the point she declares that she had popped my vein and had to stick me somewhere else. (You have got to be kidding me right?!). So I endured another very painful IV poke and just went tried to be cool with it. (The next 9 hours I was in the hospital the pain never went away).

I was wheeled to a birth room where I felt like a lab rat. I had to have fetal monitoring every hour then blood pressure and temperature and heart rate and oxygen levels, etc etc. It got very tiresome. So after a few hours the doctor checked my status and said that I was 3cm! I was so bummed. Not only had I not progressed, but the (new) nurse had given me an extra 1/2 inch. I was going backwards! So we waited even more hours to see if I would progress… and I didn’t. The doctor told the nurse matter-of-factly to start me on Pitocin. Fortunately we had a good nurse who stood up for us and she explained to the doctor that that was not what we wanted (we had written up a short birth plan which included no inductions, no drugs, etc) and said we did not want that so she wouldn’t push it. So the doctor wanted to break my water - but we didn’t want that either. The only other option was to go home because I might never progress. We didn’t want to break my water because then I would have to deliver in 24 hrs and I was worried I still wouldn’t progress and then HAVE to take drugs, etc. So we decided to go home… discouraging, but at the same time I was hoping maybe my labor would stop and I’d actually get a break from the contractions.

After getting home the contractions continued (This is Tues night: over 24 hrs from initial labor beginning). We tried watching a movie to distract me and have time pass but that only worked for so long. I always heard soaking in a tub would be good (Leah had said that’s what saved her getting to 9cm) so we decided to try that. And I agree with Leah. I didn’t have to support all my weight anymore and I was able to just relax. My contractions though started to get much more painful (later I found out this was my lovely back labor beginning). Pat timed my contractions and although they were about 7 min apart they were getting more regular, which is what you want. You’re supposed to go to the hospital when they’re about 5 min apart, but I was just in so much pain I told Pat we had to go. We got there around 1am (about 32 hrs from initial labor beginning) and the nurse there checked me. As I crossed my fingers for the results she announced that I was 7cm going easily to 8!!! I couldn’t believe it - the tub had worked and I had REALLY progressed even though contractions were so far apart. This nurse knew what she was doing (luckily I didn’t have a “new” one) because the doctor agreed with her measurements - I was worried about going backwards again.

So I don’t know what happened, but I skipped active labor all together. Early labor for hours and hours and then suddenly transition. So Pat and I were really excited, but at the same time I was in tremendous pain. I had full fledge back labor. For those who dont know what that is, Lydia (and babies in general) are supposed to face your spine and be “head down.” Well, Lydia was sunny side up with the back of her head to my spine. The baby’s head rests on the spine causing emense pressure and pain. Luckily the nurse there was experienced with back labor and pushed against my lower back (Pat was getting tired and was trying really hard, but not quite getting the spot I needed). So for like 3 hours during every contraction the nurse was up on the bed just putting all her weight against my lower back and hips. I also got a TENs unit, which is this thing were you put electrodes (like those circle sticky things with wires that they put on like people’s heads in movies where they measure brain waves and stuff) on my lower abdomen and these long electrode strips on my lower back. This little hand held thing sends electrical pulses to the electrodes. They’re not shocks or anything, but it acts as alternative stimulation to distract the brain from the pain on the contraction. You turn in up as the contraction gets worse and vice versa. So while the nurse pushed my back, Pat manned the TENs controls. By the end of it all it was on max power level. (For those who do natural childbirth though - I highly recommen it. I couldn’t have done it without the TENs unit)

The doctor came in at one point and explained she wanted to break my water to see if there was meconium because if there was, a pediatrician needed to be there for the delivery and it would take him about 30 min to get to the hospital. Pat and I were against it and wanted to wait because we figured during pushing they would break it and pushing lasts 30 min to 3 hours and so we’d have plenty of time. Later though the doctor came in again and again said she wanted to break the water (it was about 9 cm or so). We figured I was so close that it didn’t really matter so we let her do it. It was a good thing because there was meconium so he was called in.

During these last few hours I turned into the classic labor woman. I snapped at Pat more than a few times (whenever he asked me a question - I was in no state to patiently explain what I needed) and I kept yelling I couldn’t do it anymore, I was going to die, and I needed an epidural. (It sounds all calm and nice now - and actually kinda funny - but it was horrible in the moment). The nurse kept very firmly and seriously telling me I could do it; I was doing it; and I would be ok.

At this point things got worrisome. I started getting the urge to push and during the contractions the nurse noticed the baby’s heart was dropping dramatically. I was delirious so I didn’t really know the seriousness of what was going on, but I knew it was something when suddenly everyone started rushing around and the doctor started calling in these extra people to come in the room. They quickly had to put me on internal fetal monitoring because they were losing her heart rate. I was so consumed by the need to push that I was just concentrating on that. All the books I read always said it takes like at least an hour but you have a nice break in between contractions. I never felt that break. The doctor and nurse were amazed and said I was a great pusher and they just kept encouraging me to push as much as I could, telling me to stop only once. I ended up getting a pretty good size tear (probably from going so fast), but that’s ok because Pat told me later that with all those people rushing around (when I was delirious) they were preparing me for an emergency C-section. She came out surprisingly fast. The nurse told us later that I had been pushing for 8 min (not even the minimum time!), but it saved me from a c-section because the baby had to get out - and they had to get her out fast.

Pat watched the whole thing and said it was kinda funny as she was coming out because the flexible plates of her skull had kind of overlapped down the middle of her head giving her a “Cling-on ridge” (don’t know how to spell that, but it’s those guys from Star Trek). Plus on top of that she had this wet hair and a chubby blue face. Pat saw all this and was like, “Ahh! - she’s like an alien!” (He said this silently in his head of course).

Because of the meconium she inhaled, they couldn’t put her on me right away. They took her away and the pediatrician sucked out her lungs and stomach while the doctor stitched me up. She had to be taken to the nursery too to get checked out. Pat went with her leaving me alone in the room. It was actually ok though because I was just in shock and relieved it was all over.

When I finally got her, it was weird to see her and think she was the one inside of me. I hadn’t known what she was going to look like so she was kinda like a little stranger. But then she would kick and I would feel those little feet that I had become VERY familiar with and that reminded me that this little baby was the one I had been talking to and rocking and looking forward to meeting for 9 months.

So overall it was a pretty harsh experience. I wish I hadn’t had back labor because I think a natural childbirth would have been more manageable without it and I wouldn’t have such negative feelings attatched to it. At the same time though, Pat and I agree and are amazed how obvious the hand of God was in this all. There were so many points where we had to make a decision that if we had chosen something else we could have had an entirely different experience (probably a c-section Tuesday evening). Yet, everything worked out and we have a perfect and healthy baby.

I also must say that Pat did a great job in this whole thing too. If it hadn’t been for his massaging EVERY contraction and patience through 2 nights of labor I know I couldn’t have done it. He really did a fantastic job as a coach.

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May 31, 2008 by Melanee.

Tomorrow is the one-year anniversary of Kev’s passing on June 1st. Has the year gone by quickly? Yes. Life tends to wisk me away. Kev always said, “If you want to do something, schedule it” That’s because our life together was so full.
What a good husband! For years I appreciated having him everyday of my life. I told him so.
My quote, “I am so glad I married you.” He would reply, “Yea, it would be hard to explain all our children if we didn’t.”
When he was diagnosed I would say, “I am so glad I have you today.”
He would ask, “Do you know how much I love you?” I would look in his eyes and say, “Yes”

I remember Kev stealing a kiss from me in the church lobby. Someone would tease us “Hey, Hey, Hey, is that appropriate?” Kev would say, “We have a license”

I just attended our church Memorial Day Picnic. At the end they started a water fight. I thought to myself how Kev would have either started that or be deep in the middle of soaking someone.

Our family would go to Hammonasett Beach to fly kites. The children loved this. When the girls were young-one of the girls let go of her kite she was flying in the parking lot. Kev literally sprinted across the field about 1000 feet and jumped and caught the string. (The parking field is huge.) The people in the parking lot watching this gave a huge yell of excitment when he got the kite.

Our family hiked and camped alot too. Leatherman’s cave, Sleeping Giant, just to name a few. He loved the outdoors- Hiking, Kayaking, snow shoeing, camping, etc.

Our life together was too short. I am so glad I appreciated every moment with him. Did I get frustrated with him? Rarely. He was too good a guy.

Now I look forward to guiding our daughters and grandchildren. Kev left quite a legacy behind. I am sure he misses us, but he is hard at work doing what he was called from earth to do and also soaking in the beautiful scenery around him.

My memories are neatly tucked away giving me much pleasure. I love it when someone tells me some kind of memory as a friend, bishop, dad, or brother they have had with Kev.

Would I live my life again with him if I knew this would be my path?–A resounding YES

PS: I went to do an errand tonight and storm clouds came in. There was heavy rain and lightning. Just as I approach my house the sky was bright and as I faced the house I saw a full arched rainbow above our home. There have been only two times I have seen a full arched rainbow was on Mallory’s wedding day and today. Leah came home from visiting Ed’s parents and said Anya saw the rainbow too. Leah also confirmed that a rainbow appeared the day Kev passed which I did not know about. He is still watching over us.

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May 30, 2008 by Mallory.

Actually I had 6! Well…ok, so it’s not the baby that you’re possibly thinking of. As many of you know, we have 2 gerbils. The person that gave them to us said that they were both females. We’ve had them for a little while, so I figured that if they weren’t both girls, we would have babies by now, so I thought that she was right and I had nothing to worry about. Today, I looked at the cage and…surprise!!! There was a little batch of gerbil babies in the cage! Yeah. I have NO idea how to deal with gerbil babies. Also, they say that once it starts, it keeps going really quickly. So basically, I don’t know what to do and hopefully I can stop the reproduction before it gets too crazy. I don’t want 5 million gerbil babies! So if you have any idea about gerbils, please let me know!

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May 30, 2008 by Ashley.

I’ll write a longer post later, but I just wanted to get some pictures out. The more I look at her the more I think she looks like Pat. I don’t know, what do you think?

Pat wanted to show how tiny she is in the car seat. It’s cute how she is drowning in the newborn outfit we bought her. The twelve pound baby I was preparing for came out a little smaller.

Left: Our happy family! Middle: Look at her eyes and Pat’s eyes and tell me they don’t look the same. Right: I thought this was a nice one of her eyes open.

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May 28, 2008 by Melanee.

Thanks Mallory for posting. I was so frustrated that I could not post the news with not having electricity this morning for more than 2 hours.

She was born 4:40 MST today. 7 lbs. 13 oz. 18 1/2 inches
They are leaning toward naming her Lydia Eve. Ashley is doing fine just real tired from two days of labor. The hospital sent her home yesterday because she was not progressing. Pat said that they came back about 1 am and she was 7 cms dialated.

Good job Ashley, you did it. Pat thanks for your support and love for my daughter. Our family is once again blessed with another baby girl. I am so very happy to be a grandma again and can’t wait to see her.
I heard her little cries in the background. Oh, the wonderful feeling of it all.

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May 28, 2008 by Mallory.

My mom said that she didn’t have any power to post anything, so I thought I’d write something. She’ll probably write more later, and probably Ashley will too, but the baby is here! She came at 4:something (this is why they’ll write later…I don’t have much of a memory) this morning Ashley’s time. She was 7 lbs. 13 oz. Her name is Lydia. So there ya go. There’s the quick, not very good details for now. Congrats Ashley!

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May 27, 2008 by Melanee.

At 6:15 this morning I got the call I was waiting for!!
Ashley is in labor!
Oh, to be a grandma again!
This is so exciting!
Now I can make my flight plans…
I think that tornado’s low pressure system helped a little bit

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May 22, 2008 by Ashley.

So today I was excited to have a relaxing day because I am done tutoring now (yay) and the only thing I really had going on was visiting teaching tonight. So in the early afternoon I relaxed on the couch to watch some TV and it started raining outside. I was very happy about that because that means we dont have to water our lawn (the more we water…the more expensive) and the cool weather was a nice change. After a while I heard maybe some thunder and the lights flickered just a tiny bit. I wondered if I should go turn off our computers, but I thought, “nah - it is not too bad.”
Suddenly though in the middle of my show, the TV and computer zapped off. After some investigating I realized we had lost power. I tried to call Pat, but realized (surprisingly) that our phones were out too (in storms in the past I’ve never lost phones even when power was out). So I wandered around trying to figure out what to do with absolutely no power. I didn’t feel like reading or cross stitching so I figured I’d just take a nap (I haven’t been getting the best sleep lately).
About an hour later I hear my front door open, which woke me up and Pat walks in calling my name. (I was secretly thinking he might stop by the house because the phone was out and computers not working - we were talking on google chat). He had explained he was really worried about me because apparently there had been a tornado watch and it had touched down in our tiny town of Windsor. I was totally surprised! I got a bit worried because there was no way I would have heard a warning. Pat had been hearing warnings for our town and came home to check on me because he had not heard from me and couldn’t contact me. I really believe God protected me because here I was just sleeping on the couch on the ground floor totally exposed to any storm or tornado that could have passed. Before he left for work again, Pat made me promise to go in the basement away from windows if the winds started up again.
My power finally came on a few minutes ago. I put on the news and they have all this footage of my town with houses destroyed and bulldozers cleaning up debris and apparently there has been one fatality as well. Most of the damage of storms and tornado has been restricted to our town. I am so grateful that I was able to go through this horrible time relatively untouched. My thoughts go out to those far away neighbors out there who have major damage to deal with now.
I’m hoping that weather system passes - they always say with those low pressure systems it sends women into labor - and I’m not ready for that just yet!

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May 18, 2008 by Ashley.

Here’s a couple pictures I meant to put on my post before but never got around to it. So now you can see how amazingly big I’ve become! With the new hot weather here I’ve reached a new level of swelling that I never had to deal with before - my wedding ring is a tad too tight to wear and my feet feel like sausages. Glad I won’t be pregnant through the summer!

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May 17, 2008 by Marlene.

Well…it looks like Pancreatic Cancer has struck again. This was definitely shocking news and put a new spin on my perspective of how pancreatic cancer can affect my life. Now that Gramma has it it’s much more likely that it’s genetic or hereditary or whatever word you use there. I really hope that I don’t develop it later in life or that any of my children or grandchildren get it. It’s interesting how so many things can happen to a family within such a short period of time. I’m doing fine, don’t get me wrong, but it’s just a bit more nerve racking to think of what the future could hold. I guess we’ll just have to see won’t we? I’ll just have to make sure I take care of my body, which is a bit difficult out at college. I guess I’ll have to reorganize my budget so that food gets more money so I can spend more on fresh stuff instead of all that preservative packed loveliness. Darn.

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